Trust is a 5 letter word and while it's one of the hardest things to find it's also one of the easiest to lose. Nowadays I feel people have a really tough time trusting one another whether it be because of past indiscretions, paranoia, or just plain fear based from what they constantly see in the media. If you watch television on any given day it is filled with liars, adulterers, secret baby mamas, and loads of Maury "you are not the father" type shows that can convince the faint and strong of heart to just remain single and not put your trust in ANYONE..except your momma. LOL. Luckily for me I don't have a past soiled in scandal or unfaithfulness but even us strong hearted have the tendency to be overly careful when it comes to letting people into your "circle of trust".
Talking about trust leads me to the topic I want to talk about today and that is... going through the phone of your significant other lol. Even the most trusting girlfriends and boyfriends can't say they never got the urge to look in their partner's phone, even if only for a peek at a random message because you were being nosey. But when is it OK or is it ever OK?
Recently this topic was brought up and as we were discussing it I really realized how different people's view are on the topic. To me, I enjoy a certain level of privacy in all aspects of my life including the contents of my phone, whether that be from my family, friends, or boyfriend, but in the same token I am an open book with nothing to hide. My philosophy with my phone is: anything I text or send in private I have to not be embarrassed or arrested if it became public! lol Sounds extreme but that's forreal. So while I don't promote full access of my phone & messages to my boyfriend, it's also not a deal breaker if he does look through it (which he has and so have I) but that doesn't apply to every one.
One of my girlfriends is 100% ANTI going through each other's phones w/her boyfriend and while I'm not as strict, I do feel like I can understand why. Does going through your SOs phone mean you don't trust them? No. I think that it can but I feel like it really is 1. Something to do when you're bored, 2. A fun peek into how your SO (significant other) talks and acts when you're NOT around, and 3. To CHECK on what they are saying and who they are saying it to. lol. While some of those reasons are more harmless than others, I've come to understand that looking in the phone of your man or woman is almost always ALWAYS going to cause friction between the two of you, whether it be a lot or a little! lol Not because everyone is doing something bad that their SO wouldn't like but because there will ALWAYS be something that was said or not said that the other person thinks wasn't right, always. Por example: You're looking in your man's phone and some girl whose name you don't recognize says something like: "I heard Ex-Factor today and it made me think of you...." Now some questions are going to pop up in your head after seeing this. You're going to want to know, Who is that, WHY is she thinking about you during that song, WHY does she feel the need to tell you that, and WHAT kind of response is she searching for leaving all those damn ...'s at the end!!?? LOL! You see where I'm going with this?
Now I'm not saying I know it all nor do I have everything figured out and I do think that going through each other's phone is most of the time harmless but it does have the potential to make someone feel some type of way. So the question is, is the risk worth it? lol
I really want to know what you all think about this topic. I know I'm going to get a colorful array of different answers but I am interested to know am I treating it too lightly or is going through someone's phone really not THAT serious?? Comment below, tweet me, or facebook comment me!
Thanks for reading you all! :) And like always.... SEE YA NEXT MONDAY!!
*MUAH!
I always felt like the cell phone of the "SO" was off limits. To me, that would be like going through her purse.. just a major lapse in judgment. I stay far away from my wife's purse AND cell phone :) Much less drama that way..besides I trust her anyway.
ReplyDeletelove the blogs, keep em up q!
ReplyDeleteI would only go through the phone if my Special Person asked me to; for instance, to retrieve some information, pull up a pic, etc. When your SP asks you to do this, it is a sign that he/she trusts you. I purposely don't even look at who is calling should I be near her phone; I would just bring it to her. That's how much I trust and respect her. To each his/her own, though. Peace, Queen.
ReplyDeleteI prefer to keep phones off limits but If you look then I look also...
ReplyDelete"Trust me until I give you a reason not to." That's my motto. Some things should just be sacred, like your cell phone. I'm a firm believer that if your looking for something you are going to find it, no matter how innocent it really is. I have texted a person before and have had my text taken out of context one way or another (and vice versa), so imagine and outsider seeing it. It does more bad than good.
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